There is no such thing as

coincidence with God.  I have been in (and am currently still there) a season of prayer about my time and where it needs to be spent.  Last summer when I had a (little) down time from my photography business, I laid things out and prayed deeply about the direction of my business.  I prayed about how many shoots I could take on as a mom of 2 and a wife of a farmer (which is a completely different world).  I prayed about what to take on and why.  These are all things I prayed about from the get go, but I lost touch with my answers and let pleasing people take over pleasing the Lord.  The next 3 Bible studies that our church did all brought this back to the forefront, including the current one we are doing which is Nehemiah by Kelly Minter.  The other 2 were Breaking Free by Beth Moore and A Woman After God's Own Heart by Elizabeth George.  If you have done any of these you may be thinking, "Lauren, that is nothing what I got out of those books", this is probably true.  The Holy Spirit reveals different things to different people, and what may apply to me and be revealed to me through a study may be different than what you see.  It all depends on the circumstances and season of your life and heart.  But these 3 studies have each brought up time and where ours is spent at one point or another.  Where is your heart?  What do you wake up thinking about?  What is God purposing in your heart to do right now?  Every time my answer in some way is "my husband and my children".  In fact, while I was working through my Nehemiah lesson this morning, Kirby was at the kitchen bar painting with water colors.  I had a direct view of her from my bed where my Bible and book were perched on the pillow beside me.  I looked up every once in while to make sure she was not repainting our counter top, and loved the deep concentration in her eyes.  She was very quite as she painted.  Then all of a sudden she started verbalizing what she was doing right as I came to the question, "Have your priorities ever gotten out of whack?"  As she realized and shouted, "green and purple make …. brown" in the most excited voice I have ever heard from her, this question burned in my heart.  How many mornings have I rushed out the door to meet a client instead of letting her help me make breakfast?  How many evenings have I put on a show for her to watch so that I could edit a session instead of snuggle with her on the couch?  When I stick to what the Lord has laid on my heart to do for my business and family balance, it works amazingly and I have time for more of these moments.  But when I let my business over run way past what God has purposed me to do, everyone suffers, including my relationship with the Lord.  It is no coincidence that during this season of prayer for time that our ministry leader chose these studies to do.  It is no coincidence that I have other friends going through similar struggles that I get to talk with and then I say to myself, "maybe you should take a dose of your own medicine sister".  It is no coincidence that a business bootcamp I took part of for 6 weeks guided me through the same decisions the Lord was placing on my heart.  It is no coincidence that I also read a book (Hands Free Momma) that talked on each of these issues during this time.  It is no coincidence that a friend who I respect and hold her advice highly suggested something that we were already strongly leaning towards for our daughter's future, without even asking her about it.  God places people in our lives sometimes to be that push that we need.  Yes, you need to make sure that what they say lines up with His word, but you know,  sometimes we are so dumb and blind that we literally need to be knocked upside the head with the answer.

I write this as an encouragement to you … that even if you aren't going through the same exact struggle as I am, that you realize things in your life aren't coincidences.  Much of the time it is the Holy Spirit grabbing and tugging at your heart from any angle he can get to.  Slow down enough (like I am trying to do) so you can see and hear clearly whatever it is he is trying to tell you.  This is part of that medicine I am needing to take ….

Until I am 100% certain of where the Lord is directing me with my decisions, I am not going to talk about it just yet.  Just like in Nehemiah, he did not share his plan to rebuild the wall until he had all his ducks in a row.

"The heart of a man plans his way, but the Lord establishes his steps."  Proverbs 16:9