God's timing

is so sovereign.  I wish I would have "gotten" that truth and promise a long time ago.  But then I would not have half of the growth in faith that I have, so there is the blessing in that.

Yesterday was my check up for baby and to check the placenta.  Originally it was not until next Tuesday but I have this awesome, supercalafragulistic doctor who let me come in a little early to check in.

Praise the Lord the placenta was no where near the cervix.  The baby is perfect.  We had the best sonographer (word?) who showed us every little part of the baby (except the gender of course) to reassure us everything was great.  God is so good.  We apparently made this woman's day.  She said she hadn't laughed so hard in a really long time.  I said, "We have a tendency to leave an impression ... not sure if that is good or bad, but people can't forget this (as I pointed to the beared man in the corner)."  And CR was proud that he could pick out so many parts of the baby and saw the femur (you would have thought he landed on the moon) ... which then got me skeptical and thinking that I think he saw and knows the gender!  I was told to still take it easy.  I am good to shoot again (whooohooo!!!) and travel to my parents this weekend, but to go slow, take breaks, and watch the contractions closely.

I never once doubted the Lord; trusted Him that no matter what, He would receive the glory in this.  And y'all, even from my bed He has been given some hallelujahs!  Just in the past 2 1/2 weeks I have grown so much in the knowledge and grace of God.  Through time to read more and friends who are just blessings ten times over to watching movies with the kids and not being able to get up and do work or get distracted.  We have had meals every single night, care packages, sweet notes and texts, and a great friend even came over and taught me how to make those fun bubbly wreaths.  To say we are blessed is an understatement.  I can not put into words how much all of this meant to not only me, but my family.  Almost every time I told Kirby who made us dinner, she got this sweet little smile on her face and said, "awww, how thoughtful".  I love how my children can see the hands and feet of Christ at work right before their sweet little eyes.

Thank you all for the prayers.  According to my blog statistics page,  y'all are reading our story from all over, and I know you all are praying and loving us along our journey.

Now, the reason God's timing is just ... impeccable.  Today was CR's first full day back in the field.  How cool is that?  Up until now, he has been able to pop here and there, get a kid for awhile, plant some here but then stop because of the water on the ground.  We have been rained out a few times during this process and it just all timed out so well.  My in-laws and CR have been such huge huge huge helpers.  CR went to the grocery store the first week --- I don't ever want to put him through that again.  The next week my mother in law went for me and this week ...y'all, Ray went and got my kiddos all their Easter eggs and candy for their school parties.  Patton got to mow with his Daddy Ray.  Kirby got many hours with her Granny and made so many fun memories.  At first I was really, really concerned how we were going to make it and looking back, I am just amazed at the time we have all gotten to have.  CR had to learn a lot more patience ... and he did such a great job keeping up with the house, the kids, everything.  No one else I would rather be doing this life with!

To think that I once wanted to run completely away from all of this.  FAR FAR AWAY.  Ahhh, I can't imagine my life any other way now.  I am surrounded by people who love, give, care, and put themselves out time and time again.  I love this life and I am forever grateful to God and His incredible mercy upon me and my past.  His timing has always been the key to this life of ours, and this is just another testament to that.

"Wait for the Lord; be strong, and let your heart take courage; wait for the Lord!" Psalm 27:14

When life gives you lemons....

... you make lemonade.  Great ol' saying.  But how many of you actually, literally, stop and make lemonade?  It's meant to "make the best of the situation", which we have, but I also thought it would be fun (and tasty add you) to put the words to practice.  My lunch time treat will be yummy, I just know it.

My last post was about a month ago (sorry about that) and goodness me has so much gone on.  

Grammy got to come visit on her spring break which was such a joy.  Unfortunately, it was cold and rainy most  all of her stay, but it was still so wonderful.  She got to take Kirby to MDO and I think they both thought that was so special.  To be a fly on the dashboard during those car rides would have been one for the books!

She also got to go along to my 16 week checkup, so her and Kirby girl got to see the baby during the ultrasound.  I started having contractions the week before, so the doctor wanted to check and make sure all was good and in place, measuring correctly, etc.  Turns out that the ultrasound revealed I had placenta previa again.  I was not too concerned, because I had that with both the others and it corrected itself.  I was just told to take it easy, no lifting.  Apparently my 2 year old son didn't get that memo.

Friday of that week he came down with strep throat and daddy was out of town at a bull sale. Needless to say there was quite a bit of up and down with him.  A mother can not just let their baby sit there with a fever and not give comfort.  I don't care who you are, you wouldn't.  All seemed fine and we survived 2 days without daddy.  Sunday he was home, and all just felt right again.

Monday morning was a completely different story and one I cry thinking about as I was in so much pain and fear.  I also cry at God's amazing grace in this situation.  Right after breakfast I was helping Kirby get going for the day and I suddenly felt a sharp pain.  I got to the couch as quickly as I could and laid down to try to find comfort.  I hollered for CR to bring me water because I also began to feel very faint and light headed, hot flashes, and well, the worst pain I ever had.  Then came some blood.  That is when I lost it.  I had held it together well until then.  Immediately got on the phone to the Dr and they said to get there as soon as we could ... "ok, be there in about an hour."

CR saw my fear and stopped me where I was to pray with me and remind me God has a plan and this baby is in His hands.  Thank you, Father, for this amazing husband of mine.  

I was immediately sent up for a sonogram, which revealed that the placenta had partially pulled away  (from what I am not sure) ... 3rd baby and I still am clueless about so much that goes on.  I am too scared to see what might come up if I google it so I just let it go.  My husband, oh lovely husband that he is, completely gets it all.  As he watches on the monitor you hear him say things like, "oh, that's just like in a cow."  Or as in this last time, "I am seeing how all of your stuff is put together ... you wouldn't make a good birthing cow .. we'd have to ship you."  Ha, thanks love.  Anyhow, after talking with my doctor about it all, I was so thankful all was ok, but aware of just how delicate and careful I have to be right now.  I asked him, "So what does that mean?"  And he responded, "bed for you.  On your side.  Until I see you again at your next appointment in 3 weeks." And then CR invited him out to palpate cows sometime this summer with him.  What?

For those of you that know me, know this has been very hard.  I am not a layer.  I am always "up and at 'em."  That is just how the sweet God of creation wired me.  We are doing good ok.  We have some amazing friends who have brought meals and offered so much help.  The biggest help of all is prayer.   Please pray with us and our warriors 1) that this would correct itself by the next time I go in and 2) for CR and the kids.  This is a huge adjustment for us all.  Patton is so used to cuddling with me, he wants to smoosh his face to mine every chance he can just to get close enough.   Kirby is used to us doing things throughout the day, so my bed has become our craft and picnic table.  CR is not use to the kids and their days, so he is learning more and more patience as this goes on.  The Lord's timing is such a testament in this.  He knew full well about all of this.  He has delivered some much needed rain to us in the past month, so CR is out of the field currently which makes this much more doable.  We are making the best we can out of it all, and know it could be or could have been much worse and a different outcome.  Thank you most gracious Father for the protection that you alone provide.  And for blessing us with a doctor that I have so much trust, faith in, and respect for.  You are so good to us.  

This weekend, sweet Kirby girl came down with an ear infection and stomach bug.  We have been "sick free" for so long ... until now ...  but I tell you what, these lemons ain't got nothing on us and our big God.  

Oh what the Lord is teaching me during this time of rest.  I find myself praying Lord even from this bed, show me how I can glorify you.  Even if it is through laundry and coloring.  

 By the way, if you are looking for a great book to get your Christian walk deeper - a deeper understanding of why Jesus daily, this is your book!  I am walking through this book with a couple of girls and I am finding some much needed truth that I have skimmed over in the past.  

 Every cowboy needs boots, a hat, a riding buddy, and some hay for along the ride.  Pants are optional.

 The week before, Kirby and I had a date at the salon.  Much needed fun girl time!  So glad I was able to do that before this came up.  We made some fun memories that day.

My superhero Strawberry Shortcake girl.  Love her to pieces!

This verse has been screaming in my heart all week, I pray it does your soul some good.  

"From the end of the earth I will cry unto thee, when my heart is overwhelmed: lead me to the rock that is higher than I."    Psalm 61:2

"Many are the plans in a person's heart,

but it is the LORD'S purpose that prevails"  Proverbs 19:21

Right after I had Patton, I was certain he was not the last one.  With both he and Kirby, I loved every part of being pregnant.  I loved the miracle of it all, the feeling of the movement, and then the crazy delivery of not knowing what we were having and my husband being the one to show me our new precious bundle of joy.  I was definitely feeling and working on emotions.

Fast forward 6 months and I was going through closets and clothes like crazy trying to find who I could give anything baby to.  Kirby had a much harder time adjusting than I thought (ahem, planned), CR was in full swing of harvest and hay bailing that never seemed to end, and although Patton was just perfect and content, I was not.  Middle to end of 2013 was hard on me.  ridiculously harder than I thought it would be on me.  Adjusting to 2 was not what I expected.  CR and I never had time to breathe alone.  Kirby stopped sleeping through the night in her own bed as soon as we took her crib away, we were too tired (zombie like would be the right description) to put her back into her own bed when she would come in at 2 am, so we just put her in bed with us.  The wedges in all my areas grew deeper and harder to budge.  

Things started to get a little more settled after the start of 2014.  I began going back on my word that I was never having a baby again.  Emotions ran strong with all of the previously mentioned feelings.  I would go through moments of strong, "I want a baby now" and "I am never, ever, ever having another kid.  No way."  After we (barely) survived harvest, the Lord put it on my heart that I needed to bring it to him.  He already knows our plans, our hearts, our desires, but he still wants us to meet him at his throne and leave it in his hands.  So that I did.  Every Wednesday night at our women's Bible study, I put the same prayer in the prayer bowl.  I never once asked the Lord for a #3.  In actuality, it was a 3 part prayer request, with the 3rd being "whether it be your will for our life to only have 2 or to add more, please help our hearts to welcome whatever your gift is.  Help us to understand, Lord, that you are mighty and know what is to come.  Help me be content with whatever the answer."  The other 2 requests had to do with Kirby and school .... 1, do I home school? 2, do we start her in kindergarten or hold her back a year?

Fast forward to beginning of December.  CR says to me, completely random-out-of-the-blue like he loves to do, "So, before Disney and all our traveling these last few weeks, I was open to the idea of having another baby in about 2 years.  But now, snip me.  Take me in and make it official we are done."  

Even though Bible study was out, I continued to pray, I continued to have my prayer warriors pray and I was at a complete peace with just waiting to see.  

After a quick visit with just the kids and I to Montgomery, which went pleasantly well as far as ease goes, I had the strangest feeling.  I laid down to take a nap but couldn't, so I went and took a test.  Yes, I keep them in stock ... if you know our history of attempting to get pregnant you know I have about a life supply of them and other tests ;)  

Sure enough, it was positive.

I immediately went and sat down at my desk (not sure why there) and started crying -not happy tears mind you.  I am not sure why, but I had this rush of extreme doubt; the enemy saw a way in and he started dwelling on my heart hard for a good 3 minutes.  "You can't do this.  You have such a hard time with the 2 you have.  Remember, you have a husband that works long hours during certain seasons, which leaves you alone for long hours.  Speaking of husband, he is done with babies.  No chance of alone time in your near future."  Etc, etc.  Please tell me I am not alone in this fight with Satan.  Ugh.

Then I lifted my head from my hands for a quick moment, and there was my scripture flip book that I write verses on that mean something in my life.  Verses that bring me comfort, remind me of his promises, and also verses to hold me accountable.  It was flipped open to this, 

I have read this very same verse many times, and never did it hit me the way it did at that very moment.  I was instantly reminded that CR and I are not in this alone.  Wisdom, knowledge and understanding all come from the Lord when we seek it.  The rooms of our house are to be filled with rare and beautiful treasures that He gives us.  I hit my knees, first in sorrow and repentance for ever doubting our amazing Lord's plans, and then in thankfulness for what he was doing in our life.  By answering my 6 months of prayer in this way, he is making the answer to the other 2 much clearer.

I am 13 weeks along and thus far this pregnancy has not been the easiest on me, but I am reminded every day of His mercy upon my family.  Baby is safe and baking well, due August 24th.

When I asked Kirby (before she knew) if she would like another kid in the family, she said "no" without hesitation.  Whoops.  A few days later my niece spilled the beans to my mom, sister, and Kirby.  She was excited for a moment and then told me, with her sweet little mouth twisted to the side like she does, "I said I didn't want anymore."  Whoops again.  Then I explained to her that obviously the Lord wanted her to have either another brother or a little sister and she loved the idea of a sister.  However, at dinner a few weeks ago she made it very clear in her prayer where her precious little heart stood; it went something like this,

"Dear Lord, thank you for our food.  Thank you for our day today.  Thank you, (sigh) for the baby that is in mommy's tummy, but we don't want anymore after this."

The next night she added, "we don't ever, ever, ever ..."

Oh, from the mouth of babes.

There is no one else in the universe I would rather be doing this life with.  I am so thankful for my best friend.  So thankful for a God leading, servant hearted husband and father.  God always knows and His purpose prevails.  I am so thankful that I didn't steer clear of this man when I really wanted to.  And I am also thankful he did not faint when I told him the news.  ;)

Cows to the left of me,

Cows to the right, here I am in stuck in the middle with you.   And I love it!  These are just the cows that surround our house....they are my lovely neighbors.

We obviously love our cows.  Patton wakes up asking to see and feed the cows.  I am not sure if he dreams about them or if he just wakes up and instantly knows they need to be fed first thing.  Maybe eventually we will get him a horse to round up his cows with.  But for now, he sure is cute walking through the pastures hollering "whoooo cows, c'mon"!  In fact, when sister isn't moving fast enough for his liking, her corals her too and tells her "c'mon ...whoa"!

Dave Ramsey

is a brilliant man and an excellent teacher.  If you have never heard of him, I challenge you to go here to check out his business, which is actually a ministry to so very many people.  We are so thankful God placed his program in our lives when he did.  Sometimes we wish we had found him sooner (ok, all the time) but we are thankful that it was not years down the road buried in even more daunting debt.

We have had many people ask us about our Dave story, and I finally was encouraged to sit and write it all out after Sunday School this morning.  Our church started up his class this past week, and my husband impromptu decided to share a little bit about our blessing from the program.  As I saw the eyes of some other desperate people in our church longing to be debt free, I decided to share as much of our full story as I could.

 Before I get started, I want you to understand that I am sharing this so that others (possibly yourself if you need the encouragement) to see that it is possible.  I know for me, seeing people on the commercials or on the videos was neat, but it was not REAL to me because I had no clue who they were.  This is me.  This is our story and it is as real and dirty as the pig in the pen down the road.  I share this for God's glory.  He provided over and above opportunities for both CR and I to work more than usual for us to meet these goals.  We prayed and prayed for abilities, desires, and jobs to come our way.  I felt like during this time, the verse ""Whoever can be trusted with very little can also be trusted with much, " Luke 16:10 was living out right in front of us.  At first we just had a few ways and as God saw us being faithful to Him with what we had, he provided more and more each week for us to work more to earn the money.  As I look back I am brought to tears in awe of his grace for us.

Now, for our debt free journey.

When we got married in November of 2006, I came into our marriage with about $50,000 in student debt and a brand new car that carried a $30,000 loan balance.  Within that next year, we moved to South Texas and were convinced we needed a Rain Soft Water softener from Home Depot for about $4000.  No big deal, just open a Home Depot credit card and pay it off in 6 months interest free.  Well then I did not get a teaching job that next year, and just subbed.  Whoops.  With all my free time I decided why not get my masters degree?  Just add it to my student debt.  A year and half later and $30,000 added to my student loans (which I was always told was good debt .... LIES) I had my Masters.  Big deal.  At my new teaching gig it only gave me a  $1000 bonus.  Not so much of a promise to be worth it and pay for itself soon.  Yikes.  That next summer since I was not getting pregnant on my terms of timeliness I decided to get my principal certification.  It was JUST $6000 through the ESC and I could pay it off within the year I was in the program.  But what about all that other debt?  Oh, just keep paying the minimums and you will get through eventually.  Yikes.  And then since we still weren't getting pregnant, why not build a house?  And get a Direct Buy membership for $3000 to help you with those expenses ... you know, going through Direct Buy will save you 10 times over your membership cost when building a new home yourself.  FALSE.  So, let's recap .... we are at about $123,000 in debt scattered out here and there so it didn't look that bad.  Whoa.  How did that even happen?  That did not even include the house.  

In January of 2010 is when we started the process of our house.  We took Dave Ramsey in March of that year.  As we were going through the class, some emotions of regret MAY have creeped up our backs at each meeting.  But this is where we were, so let's buckle down and get to it.  I have on my notes that when we started getting serious, we were $225, 000 in debt including the house.  By December of 2013 we were down to  $157, 766 (with the house) and by June of 2014, we were debt free except the house.  I say that because that is the way Dave Ramsey likes to do it.  You pay off everything except the house, then build on other things (emergency fund, college, retirement) and then pay off the house after all of that.  So, to wrap it up, we paid off over $123,000 in debt (I say over because of the WONDERFUL interest rates) in about 4 years.  In those 4 years, I had 2 children via c-section (hello hospital bills), quit my full time teaching job to stay home, started a new business, sold a car and cash flowed a newer one, and still survived.  We definitely could have cut even more corners than we did.   FOR SURE.  However, this is what worked for us.  I remember sharing with my parents and grandmother one night over dinner that at the end of each month, I usually cook beans and cornbread (instead of rice and beans like Dave suggests) because it really does save on groceries.  I remember my grandmother looking at me puzzled and said, "Oh Lauren, y'all aren't that bad off, are you?"  I said, "No, but right now, until we get out of this burden on our shoulders, we will do whatever we can to save wherever we can."  

Being able to take a vacation to Disney World after we were debt free, was such an amazing feeling.  Here is our "WE'RE DEBT FREE" scream.

Another thing, we did not, and I say this with such thanks to God but encourage you to not skimp on it either, ever miss a tithe for church.  We truly believe that because we were faithful with that, the Lord was faithful and continued to provide ways to work above and beyond.

"You must set aside a tithe of your crops--one-tenth of all the crops you harvest each year." Deut. 14:22

Do you have a Dave Ramsey story?  I would love to hear!!!  We are on Baby Step 4 and so eager to get to pay off the house within a few more years.  

Disney World

Ahhh, the most magical place this side of Heaven.  I think since the day of Kirby's birth I have dreamed of taking her to Disney World.  I so desired to keep princesses (mainly the mother overload of princesses and the princess like attitude that often accompanies) away from Kirby.   I have known many of toddlers, and some much older for that matter, that took the princess thing way too far and just short of insisted others call them as such, so I did not want to have to go there.  You know what I mean ... I am sure you have met one or five in your lifetime as well.   I was scared that they would overtake my dirt loving, boot wearing, curly toped little doll; instead they brought her more imaginative play than I could have ever dreamt up.  Slowly they have found her, but thankfully between prayer and parenting, we have been able to keep it down a notch.  She likes the idea of them and seems to play dress up throughout they day, but the movies they are in don't seem to appeal to her too much.  Rapunzel is her favorite.  Favorite.  Cinderella comes in a close second.  So we knew this was the time in her life that we needed to get to fantasy world.

Rewind back to this post.  We decided that since we have been putting all we could towards debt the last six years (if only we had found Dave Ramsey before we got married!) that our family deserved a bit of a celebration and treat.  And treat it was.

 I am so glad she got to see Sofia.  She is her all time favorite and I am so happy about that.  I love what Sofia's story portrays, her humbleness, and her love for just about everyone she meets.

 We got the photo pass added on to our package.  Eh, I may say next time we save our money.  They did get some good shots, but for the most part I was disappointed in their "eye".  Right behind us is a gorgeous, HUGE, lovely Christmas tree.  I wanted to get one in front of the tree to show just how big it was .... hmmmm, well we can see an ornament or 2.

 Snow White gave Patton a kiss that stayed on all day.

 Day 2 in the afternoon came down pours .... it did not slow this squirt down one bit!

 It got cold, I mean super cold on us.  Yes, we are from South Texas and wimps for the most part, however, we were not prepared for 40 degrees, wet and wind.  I had on 2 pairs of pants, 2 pairs of socks, boots, 3 shirts, a fleece vest, gloves and a ski cap and still was chilled to the bone.  

 Possibly the best part of the whole deal for CR and I was the musical light show that was at Hollywood Studios.  Amazing.  Took my breath away.

 CR was amazed that the tractors in the movie Cars started out as a cows head.  So need to see the animation side of things.  

     I think it is safe to say that Disney World was a good run for Patton Luke.  This was him on the plane ride home.  Funny story ... on the way there he was great but active and bouncy, and Kirby slept most of the way there.  So I told CR, "Hey, how about on the way home we switch so you can be blessed by Patton's inquisitiveness for 2 hours and I can snuggle with Kirby."  Bit me in the booty ... Kirby was the bouncy, active, curious little doll on the way home.  

This is for sure something that I would love to do with my family again.  We would like to wait probably another 2 years, though, so that Patton could enjoy it more and for Kirby to be taller.  She was just shy of the 40" marker so there were quite a bit of rides we missed out on.  Also, at this age they are both a little skeptical (ok scared to death) of dark and loud, so some of the shows were not great for them.  But the princesses at this time in her life were worth every minute and dime of the trip.  Disney does everything over the top and awesome.  On our anniversary, they had balloons and a card delivered to our room.  Everywhere we ate, the food was great, whether it be at a quick stop, buffet, or the sit down service restaurants.  Everyone was over the top friendly and greeted you with the warmest of smiles.  I also felt like we went at a great time of year; despite the crazy cold front that came through (everyone there said it was totally unexpected and rare) I would do that exact week again.  The lines were fast, even the ones that we did not have a fast pass for.  The longest we waited was about 20 minutes for the Sofia signing and that was because she had to take a quick break while we were in line.    

All praise goes to the Lord for allowing this trip to come to fruition.  I am so thankful that he blessed me with clients who booked me, bought their pictures, referred me, and for the many extra opportunities that CR has been given to make a little extra money here and there.  When you are diligent, faithful, and pray about your funds, it is amazing (aaahhhhhmazing) how the Lord provides ways for you to earn it.  The money is not going to just fall on your plate (I am still looking for that money tree I once heard about) but sometimes the opportunities do.  I am forever grateful for this moment we got to step away from the farm and from my business to completely be a family of 4.  I am thankful the kids adjusted well and did not have trouble napping or sleeping in the evenings.  I am thankful for a husband who became a kid again to join in on the adventure and memories.  

""Glory to God in highest heaven, and peace on earth to those with whom God is pleased."  Luke 2:14